Today’s Guest Blogger: The Minion.

The Minion and The Sandman

From time to time I have guests blog whatever it is they feel like blogging. I will not tell them what to blog; I won’t edit it; I won’t influence the Guest Blogger in any way.

The Minion. Pro Wrestling. Being (and not being) recognized as a “porn star”. Can I tell you guys that in my Producer’s vault lay 100+ scenes of The Minion fucking the hottest new (well, they’re not so new anymore) Porn Whores? That’s right…all 350 pounds of him with his steamin’ 4 inch dick. I’ve been on set a few times when it all went down, and I gotta tell you…when this shit hits the net, things just won’t be the same anymore.

Stay tuned, my brothers — your pal, Billy.

We are all in the porn business and run the risk of getting STD’s, woodless scenes, and being recognized by the public. I was Chico Wang’s right-hand man for quite a while and he shot me with some of the best cum sucking whores out there. I popped my video cherry in November 2003 with Mason Storm. She showed absolutely no mercy as she sat on my face, ridiculed my physique, and urinated on me all in the basement of Boogie Nights 2.0. I knew at that moment that my life would take a different turn since G-d knows how many people would end up watching it.

Fast forward months after that and the Wang has me knee deep in pussy all the while he’s trying not to shake the camera too much from his constant laughter from girls beating the daylights out of me. No problem was to be had, except for the constant lack of wood on my part and bloated belly as a result of mass quantities of food involved.

Wait, I’m going to make a point here sooner rather than later. I knew I would eventually be recognized in public by those not in the “jizz bizz”. I was waiting for the moment I would be in a 7-11 getting some chocodiles or nachos with cheese (who only knows how long that cheese has been in that machine!) and being called out by some onlooker with words of, “Hey, you’re the Minion!” It’s happened only a few times and I want to document to you when it happened.

I’m a huge Extreme Chapionship Wrestling Fan — the ’92 – 2001 years and not the shit on tv now. When I was told of a reunion show that several of their alumni were holding in Philadelphia, I made plans to attend. Then the WWE announced they were having an ECW show entitled “ECW:One Night Stand” in New York 2 days after the Philly show. I made plans to fly out with porn mope, Manuel Laybor, and left Porn Valley for a few days.

Now picture in your mind the following: A Bingo Hall in a horrible part of Philadelhia, the same building at about 115 degrees fahrenheit, and 1100 screaming fans inside and you have an idea of what I was surrounded by. It was a fucking oven inside and I was sweating crisco. It was then time for intermission and I made my way to get some fresh air outside when these words stopped me in my tracks: “Dude………………you’re the Minion!”

I had to think to myself if I heard what I thought I heard. In fact, yes I did. I turned to my right and saw a guy with some of his pals and he had the same kind of smile a 5 year old kid has when you take him to the mall to meet Mr.T. I shot the shit with him for a while and all was good. Remember, I’m almost 3000 miles away from the comfort of Chatsworth and the marketing machine known as Chico Wang was able to get my face and name known on the opposite side of the country. I thought it was a fluke and left the building for a few minutes to get a cheesesteak sandwich that wasn’t so good.

It’s now Monday, the day after the WWE show, and I’m in JFK airport ready to come back home. Again, I get recognized, but this time it’s by a traveler and not a wrestling fan. He tells me he knows about the insane shit I’ve done on camera and whatnot. So in the course of 2 days I was spotted by 2 people on the East Coast and it made my trip better.

But New York pizza was actually greater than being recognized.

The Minion

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