I started this blog as nothing more than an outlet. I never expected any sort of readership — let alone “fans” — but I’ve got both now…which, of course, can be a good thing — or a bad thing.

With readership comes criticism, and there’s two types of that: critics that have something constructive to say, and those whose agenda it is to simply bash. And I don’t care what anyone says, either one can be tough to swallow.

It’s always nice to hear good things about your work, and when someone has something bad to say…well, at least they’re saying something, right? Cause that’s better than when no one has anything to say at all.

One of my fans IM’s me via yahoo chat. He’ll ask how I’m doing, and who I’ve shot, and who I’m going to shoot, and he’ll tell me what scenes I’ve shot that he likes, and the ones that are just so-so, and the ones that he feels failed…and I’m OK with anything anyone has to say about my movies, cause…well, it’s just porn, right?

Then he shows me this.

I’m OK with what people have to say about my movies; the writing is a different story.

…he seems so bored with his job that it doesn’t really make me want to read about it.

I really don’t take the movies I make very seriously. Which isn’t to say I don’t put 100% into them. It takes a lot of time to cast and to schedule, along with everything else that goes along with preproduction; I make sure my production values are right on while I’m shooting; I treat my actors with respect; I change up scenarios so no one gets bored; which is to say I take my job very seriously and I do my best. But to me, porn is porn, and the sole purpose of porn is to make sure the consumer blows his wad.

The End.

[I Shoot Porn] elicited absolutely zero from me. It didn’t make me frown or smile. No pity, no thought, no inspiration, not even desire. The porn stars all had the expected histories. He was expectedly cordial and friendly and complimentary of all the girls. The photos were more skeevy than sexy. None of the cartoons were funny.

I can hear the surf pound the sand. I’m sitting in a beach-side rental near San Diego, banging this out. The weather is perfect and there’s a million hot chicks running around in bikinis, and I’m amazed how almost each and every one of them is flawless in their own way…and that turns me on way more than anything I’ve ever shot before.

Some of the best (comparatively) writing was the stuff that made little or no reference to porn. Maybe he’s just painted himself into a corner?

I just scored tickets to two Wilco shows: Berkeley (August 24th) and Los Angeles (the following Wednesday). I haven’t traveled to see a band since I started going to concerts in 1978 (8th grade, Van Halen, $3.93 at the Celebrity Theater, Phoenix Arizona), and I’m geeked on going…although the LA show can’t really be considered traveling. I’m still trying to figure out if I just like the new record, Sky Blue Sky, or if I really like Sky Blue Sky.

I didn’t hate it, I didn’t love it. I was rather indifferent. It was like mediocre porn — redundant and eventually boring. Porn shouldn’t be boring.

I’ve had the weirdest shit happen to me this summer, and summer just started: a family member of a Porn Whore I work with called my cell phone and accused me of giving her booze and drugs so she’d do the things she’s done over the past 3 and 1/2 years, which is not only absurd, but painful and disturbing on all sorts of levels as well; the local charity case in my building — a guy we’ve fed and given work and helped the best we could — went postal and decided he wanted to kill everyone in sight…literally; Barbie Cummings got pulled over by a cop, and need I say more (cause I’m sure you know all about it already!) and now she’s just married a dude she met only days earlier; finally, I’ve had to kill two scenes over the last two weeks, and I haven’t had to do that since I started shooting smut almost 5 years ago.

It’s some regular seeming dude, doing what about 75% of guys secretly aspire to do. IE give up a crummy job and bang hot chicks.

Speaking of banging hot chicks, I shot Madison Scott recently for Manojob. Nope, I didn’t bang her, but god damn I wanted a piece of that ass. Why do people think because I shoot porn, I bang hot chicks? Or any chicks, for that matter?! As a matter of fact, I hardly get laid at all. Maybe it has something to do with something that (Not the Real) Ron Jeremy wrote in about, or simply the fact that I’m caring less and less about getting laid lately? Maybe I need to get on that testosterone therapy treatment I’ve been reading about.

He can write clearly and has a interesting point of view. It’s not just about porn, and it humanizes that side of the business.

There’s a couple of reasons my mind goes back and forth so much with Sky Blue Sky. It’s not obvious, and that can be a good thing…or it can be a bad thing. With anything that’s art, only time will tell. The song “Impossible Germany” drives me whacky, even though all the critics think it’s the best track on the CD. When I listen to parts of the record it kinda reminds me of when I was a kid — growing up in Chicago — and all I ever listened to was WLS: Wings and Steely Dan and 10cc.

I don’t think the average woman will find it interesting but they might learn something from it.

Did I mention I bought Sky Blue Sky on CD and vinyl? Here’s the cool thing — if you buy the vinyl, they throw the CD in, and there’s DVD stuff on it. I have no idea what it is, cause the record’s at home, and I’m in California.

He’s funny at times, but not enough and not very insightful or compelling.

After San Diego, it’s LA Erotica this weekend; in fact, it’s going on right now. I like the big events for one reason — the girls get treated like stars. Instead of getting bashed for what they do, they get positive attention from fans, and they sign autographs and pose for pictures and all in all that’s a good thing.

Obviously porn is an interesting subject but like everyone else is saying, the guy’s too bland. In a lot of ways he’s just your typical so-so blogger, except that his life happens to include some things people want to hear about.

My blogging has slowed down cause I feel like I’m running out of things to say. I’ve had people tell me I need to blog everyday in order to keep my traffic up. I’ve had people tell me what I can and can’t blog. I’ve had people tell me they love my blog. I’ve had people tell me my blog sucks.

As long as I have something to say, I’ll say it. Might not be everyday, and you might not always like it…but, just like anything else, if you like it you can read it, and if you don’t, then just don’t come back.

In the meantime, I’m back to Sky Blue Sky.