Super Fun E-mails of the Intellecutal Sort.

Leighlani Red

D. writes:

Mr. Watson,

….I must say that most of my suppositions about the nature of porn “actresses” have proved to be wrong, witness your recent interview with LeLani Red. She seems to have her head screwed on remarkably well. Of course serial killers are always the ones who seem so well adjusted.

“He was always so quiet.”

“He liked animals.”

“He let me keep things in his many spare refrigerators.”

I agree with you about the milk white skin that some red heads have and despite the racist overtones I like seeing them contrasted against a darker brother. How I’d feel about Bill Walton doing Lil Kim, three words, pay per view. Of course that is one of the other quotes that should alert you to the presence of a serial killer:

“He always brought home girls with the nicest skin… No, I don’t recall any leaving.”

I bring up racism because you wondered aloud (in print? in bytes?) about the popularity of interracial porn, so I did research. After scanning page after page of mostly white women tearing up as they were penetrated by some Mandingo’s love sledge. I came to the conclusion its unconscious racism albeit to the benefit of the black man at the expense of his prostate.

It seems that a vast percentage of porn is devoted to demeaning or at least dominating girls. There is as I’m sure you’ll agree a vast amount of weird stuff out there for the 100% of Americans jaded by their sex lives. They are looking for something “dirty” which by definition is anything your girlfriend won’t do and what they won’t do is anything humiliating, unless of course you get that one in a million that actually enjoys putting up with our disgusting little games. (I wish they’d wear a sign around their neck.)

ATM, Bukkake, piss drinking, gagging, Max Hardcore and any sort of anal requires at least a strong humiliation fetish to sustain any one’s interest. (Except in Germany, where I believe the entire population of weedy perverts is united in their quest to urinate on every other German. Its amazing that these same people nearly conquered Europe. Twice!) I believe that part of the unconscious charm of interracial porn is that a white girl is extra degraded when she does one or more of those dangerous black studs. If every one was so darn fascinated by watching colored and white folk get it on there would be an equal number of black girls getting buggered by white guys, n’est pas? I’d also suggest our Black friends secretly like tearing up the tight white booty for the same
reason. I’ll bring it up at the next NAACP convention.

I must say Eat Some Ass, (Speaking of vaguely demeaning behavior) continues to entertain and inform. I took the eHarmony test but instead of answering the questions I just wrote I WANT MY ASS EATEN! in large block letters with crayon. I got 11,527 returns from women in Los Angeles and one from the guy that does the commercial.

Oh and the last serial killer warning quote:

“He looked so familiar, was he in an eHarmony ad?”


“Did he do a lot of German porn?”


Dear D.

Please leave the Germans out of this…they’ve been blamed for too much already.

Your pal — Billy

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