Super Fun e-Mails: Don’t Be An Asshole!

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Beggleman Pinnefrew writes:

Bill — don’t be an asshole!

I realize you’re a small-businessman with lots of people hanging on you and bugging you all the time.

But you say that Jason Brown was a good, solid employee of yours for several years. A go-to guy you depended on.

So if he wants to talk to you for 5 un-interrupted minutes, you should listen. Even if you know what he’s going to say and it’s all gibberish, you owe it to him as a sign of respect without giving him the goodbye-and-goodluck heave-ho, kicking him out the door.

I read it & it seemed cold and un-necessarily curt. You would be a better person for it – even if it’s Christian BS – at least you’d have a proper end to that relationship and not be a scarred, antisocial freak, which as I understand it is a major potential pitfall of your profession. Try to avoid it.



Mr. Pinnefrew I’d like to first say — great name dude. Bravo.

On to Mr. Jason Brown: I really tried to see your point, and maybe I was an asshole, but there’s a few things I think you didn’t consider. First, Jason’s very erratic behavior effected my small staff. It went beyond my comfort zone. Maybe I didn’t do a good job with the writing to make that appear clear…but, yea, he totally freaked out my bookkeeper.

That put him on thin ice, and it put me in Defense Mode.

There’s a time and a place for everything, too. Don’t you think? I wish Jason would have said something like, “I know you’re about to shoot now, but when you wrap, do you think we could have a few minutes?”

But that’s rational behavior, and it’s seldom seen in my biz.

What is seen a lot in my biz is Crystal Meth.

I do not know Jason’s on meth, but that’s the behavior pattern he’s exhibiting. I knew that when he made his initial “I-Want-To-Show-You-Something” phone call; that, or he was going to try and convert me to his spiritual beliefs.

I have zero tolerance for either agenda, and I’m sorry if that makes me an asshole…but it is what it is.

A lot of the girls in my biz take drugs that make their hearts go pitter-patter as a way to control their weight. A lot more of the girls in mainstream modeling do the same. If it ain’t a habitual coke habit, it’s meth.

Meth is fucking Evil, bro.

Evil incarnate.

But I don’t need to tell you that, do I?

I was gonna spin into a bunch of meth stories — from people who refuse to speak dirctly to you and only have written dialogues on yellow legal pads so the enemy can’t “hear” them with their “devices” to the Russian Mob is “after me” to the KKK is “after me” to homes with the windows lined with empty pizza boxes with tiny holes drilled into them to “leave LA at once cause there’s gonna be riots”…but I won’t.

Instead I’ll respectfully disagree with you, and say that — under slightly different circumstances — I would have engaged Jason in more than 5 minutes of conversation, and I look forward to the day Jason would like to have that conversation in a reasonably friendly place, during a time convenient to both of us.

By the way, if Jason ever makes the decision to jump back in The Porno Game, he’s welcome to my set any day. As long as he leaves the spiritual conversations and paranoid schizophrenic behaviors at the door.

Your pal — Billy

PS: I also took some heat for even blogging this mess in the first place…but I stand by my decision.

PSS: Am I really coming across as “scarred, antisocial freak”?

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