Category Archives: Here’s the Skinny on Your Favorite Star

Let’s Talk About Riley Mason!

Riley Mason free hand job movies
When I was in junior high, I had a Social Studies teacher who was a total hippy. He’d play records on one of those small turntables you’d get from the school’s A/V department, while we were working on whatever it was we were working on that day. One of his favorite records was “The Worst of Jefferson Airplane”, and I’d always wonder why anyone would name anything “The Worst of”…until now.

For a minute and a half, Riley Mason was the shit in Porn Valley. Her fan base was fairly diverse, but the “Indie Rock Dudes” nationwide took a particular liking to her…as did I. In a nutshell, anything “indie” (music, art, film) means it just hasn’t reached the masses yet. Anyone “Indie” means they stumbled upon it before you did, which, of course, makes them cooler than you.

Riley was Pure Indie, and one of the first Indie Chicks to start fucking and sucking on camera for the world to see. This drove the Indie Dudes mad, and I mean literally mad. They loved to beat off to her, and once they blew their load, they loved to shit talk her. I’ve come to discover it’s a pretty common guilt complex. Anyway, a lot of them frequented a chat board called “Hipinion“, and it’s still around, although I have no idea how relevant it is anymore. But these Indie Dudes would just rail on poor Riley, and do stupid things like post her real name, and her computer chat names, and then harass her endlessly. I jumped in to the drama a bit, and then came after me, too, proposing a variety of ill wills pointed my way. Must be nice when you have that much time on your hands. But what do you expect from a bunch of “pasty losers and alcoholics”? (Note: Urban Dictionary’s words…not mine).

Rereading this brings back all those memories, plus more, cause I mention Chico Wang here, and as you probably know he was found dead a few years ago in a cheap motel in Northern California after some particular gnarly nastiness.

Ah — those wanton days of yesteryear!

This blog’s original air date: February 11, 2006.

So I’m at Chico Wang’s, cause I booked Riley for my site — the world’s greatest hand job site — Mano Job! I’m at Chico’s shooting cause…well, I kinda like it over there. It’s dirty and depraved, just like a true Porno House in Porn Valley is supposed to be. I booked Riley Mason again cause I love her looks, and I think she’s one of the hottest girls in the game right now, and she’s a pleasure to be around.

Right before we started rolling film, we sat down for a brief chat. An impromptu interview, so to speak. It got very intense at times. I listened carefully as Riley explained some of the things going on in her life right now. I didn’t have a pen and paper, and my memory is weak, so I won’t quote her here…but these are some of the topics we touched upon:

1) The Indie Rock Dudes who constantly harass her online.

2) The “fat pic” roaming around the internet that’s supposedly her.

3) A general overview of her life in porn.

I tried to explain to Riley that indie rock dudes, as a whole, are a nutty bunch. They’re very repressed individuals, usually, that don’t get laid too much, and when they do, it’s fodder for the next 10 years of their life. Like…they’ll be at a Death Cab For Cutie show bragging about the girl they banged in 92, right after the Superchunk show. That sort of thing.

Then Riley brought up the published chat logs, most of which are fabricated, at least in part. Some of the things in these chat logs she really did type out, but most of it she didn’t.

“That’s cause they like you a whole lot, Riley. And besides, I’ve read some of those chats, and I think it’s pretty obvious when it’s you and when it’s not.”

She said that was a weird way of showing affection.

“I know Riley, but remember, this is a weird bunch of guys. They seldom talk to girls, unless they’re clerking in the used record store they work at…a job that usually pays them minimum wage; a job that’s very important to them and makes them cool people. It’s also the only time girls approach them – generally. That or when they’re at the Indie Club listening to Indy Rock and the girl spent her last sawski and only then she might approach Dude and ask him to buy her a beer. That’s about it, really.”

She’s bummed though. When they discovered her screen name, they published it all over the net, then hit her up for chat all the time, then made up some chat and turned it into her words, and then found this pic of a fat girl that somewhat resembles her, and spread that all over the place saying it was her, and on and on.

“That’s cause they like you a whole lot, Riley. And they have a whole lot of time on their hands.”

We kinda left it at that. But overall, Riley Mason likes her life in porn right now. She’s having a fun time and making good money, and life’s generally very good for her. At least that’s what it seems like to me.

Too bad the same thing can’t be said for all those Indie Rock Dudes.

Austin O’Reilly

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When I was in junior high, I had a Social Studies teacher who was a total hippy. He’d play records on one of those small turntables you’d get from the A/V department at the school’s library, while we were working on whatever it was we were working on that day. One of his records was “The Worst of Jefferson Airplane”, and I’d always wonder why anyone would name anything “The Worst” of…until now.

The very first pay site I ever owned was Spunkmouth. I loved Spunkmouth. Very much. There were three of us driving The Spunkmouth Boat; one of us was very enthusiastic about driving the boat, and the other two hardly ever really got behind the wheel.

As my grandfather once told me, “a partnership is a sinking ship” — no truer words ever spoken.

I bailed a few years ago, but Spunkmouth is still a float.

I hold fond memories of this particular scene, cause I was so new to the whole porno game, and I shot this on my very first solo trip to Porn Valley. I say “solo trip” cause — as the blog mentions — I had just returned from my stint as Second Cameraman for Blacks on Blondes. Anyway, upon my triumphant return, I rented a cheap room for 2 days, in which I shot 4 scenes. The very first time I directed “real” porno stars in Porn Valley.

Ah — those wanton days of yesteryear!

This blog’s original air date: September 26, 2005.

The day after I shot Kitty, I booked Austin O’Reilly for a b/g scene at that same shitty hotel room.

I met Austin a year or so earlier at Dogfart’s secret mansion, and I liked her from that moment on. She was always down for almost anything, had a great attitude, and always looked great. In fact, one of the craziest scenes I ever shot was with Austin and Bella Donna; Dogfart asked me to work the camera while he took stills. It was a g/g featuring — among other things — Bella and Austin eatins each others’ asses.

I’m not a huge fan of lesbo porn, but the things these two did blew me away.

Fast forward to now. Austin walks in the room. My partner is blown away. I’m blown away. And while we wait for the male talent to show, both of us just kinda stand there and watch Austin get ready for her scene. We try for small talk, and it’s a pretty lame attempt. I think I shot this pic…although my partner might have. I really don’t remember.

Here’s what a porn girl looks like as she preps for her job. My only regret is we didn’t know enough then to hire a make-up artist…not cause Austin couldn’t do her own make-up. She just deserves her own make-up artist.

Robbie James ended up pounding Austin that day. In fact, he pounded her so hard, he ended up bonking her head against the hanging lamp above one of the tables in the room — and that’s right before he unloaded right in her face.

Pure filth.

As smutty as it gets.

Another Spunkmouth classic.

I never heard from Austin after we wrapped that day. In fact, not too long after that, Austin did what most porn girls do…and that’s vanish into thin air. No more Austin on any agent’s site, and no more Austin working the porno circuit. I guess it was just time for her to move on, and I think that’s a great thing.

Spend too much time in this biz and you’re doomed for sure.

Introducing Janie Jones

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When I first met Janie Jones, she wasn’t Janie Jones. She was Jane Doe, and she’s from the mid-west, and she was fresh off the bus and doing go-sees that day.

(A “go-see” is Porno Speak, and it’s all about taking the girls around town and showing them off to producers and directors. It’s really nothing more than a cattle call, something akin to the Howard Stern show — when Howard and his Gang “evaluate” girls for Playboy. It goes something like this: a suitcase pimp (or an agent, if the girl is lucky enough to have an agent) stops by, parades the girls in, has them strip, and then I shoot a pic or two or three and send them to the folks at Blacks on Blondes, and if they’re approved, they get a job. And no, before you ask, I don’t Casting Couch them.)

(Casting Couch is Porno Speak for having a girl suck or fuck you to get the job. Wait a sec — this isn’t really “porno speak” at all, cause it happens every day in Hollywood. You don’t really think your favorite starlet got her first job based on acting ability…do you?)

I booked Janie Jones immediately, and the next day she was in The Manojob make-up chair, ready to do her very first scene. But she still wasn’t Janie Jones.

We usually shoot BTS, and it’s usually shot in the make-up chair. “We” being myself or The Minion, and I usually let The Minion roll on BTS, cause he’s way better at it than I. This time The Minion was off at his girlfriend’s house — which he never wants to admit. He’ll tell me things like “I’ve got a lot to do today and I can’t stop by” or “Hey Billy I gotta go get my brakes looked at so I won’t be in today”.

The Minion’s had his brakes “looked at” about 17 times since Yom Kippur ended.

And I have no idea why he won’t man-up to having a chick. Kinda weird if you ask me.

Anyway, I’m shooting BTS, and the first question I ask is, “tell everyone at home your real name.”

“Jane Doe,” she said.

Any time a porno chick gives up her real name during BTS (or shooting the scene), you know you’ve got a first-timer on your hands.

I stop camera. “Um, Jane, you don’t want to use your real name. I mean there’s nothing wrong with using your real name as your porno name if you want. Dana DeArmond and Julia Bond are perfect examples. Remember, use your stage name. I’ll start over.”

“But I don’t have a stage name.”

I love giving girls stage names. Off the top of my head, I’ve named BJ Swallows, Anna Von Trapp, Kimmy (I know…boring), Keesha Knight — and now I get a shot at Jane Doe.

This is a serious thinking process. One I don’t take lightly. And fuck the Name-Your-First-Pet-and-Street-You-Lived-On-When-You-Were-A-Kid process…although that can work out rather nicely (the process used for Keesha Knight).

My porno name would be Dino Birch. If I could add about 3 more inches to my ween, I’d be Dino Birch, and I’d be painting the town white.

But I’m not.

I looked at Jane Doe and thought hard: “You’re so mid-west…and I hate to say this…so girl-next-door, I’d really, really say you need to have a name that matches your look. For example, when I blog this story, I’m gonna call you “Jane Doe”, cause I won’t use your real name. But that’s your look. Total Jane Doe. Which isn’t a bad thing at all. It’s really good if you ask me. I like to watch girls you’d never think do porn, doing porn. You know? The whole bleach-blonde fake titty tatted up girl that’s gone though lipo and had her teeth veneered and her hair isn’t really her hair but it’s a weave is so dumb…if you ask me, of course.”

“Well, I was thinking of naming myself Zaylen Skye.”

“Ugh. With a name like that, you’d be just another one of about 30 thousand. Besides, it doesn’t fit.”

She frowned.

I thought. I couldn’t shake “Jane”, and there’s no way “Jane Doe” would work — although Jon Doe did pretty well with that name — until he offed himself.

And then there’s John Doe, the bassist for X, a favorite of mine. Well, up til ’83 I really liked X, then they kinda faltered, and then Billy Zoom quit…and then I quit paying attention.

By the way, this was going through my head. What I just wrote. About Jane Doe and Jon Dough and then John Doe and then punk rock and how much I loved to catch X play back in the day and how much I like punk rock and how much I miss how new and raw punk used to be and how it is no longer…and then…suddenly…it hit.

“Janie Jones!”

Janie Jones looked at me. I looked at her.

Closely. “Yes. That’s a perfect name! Your new name is Janie Jones!”

“Janie Jones?”

“Janie Jones! Do you know about The Clash?”




He’s in love with rock ‘n’ roll, woah
He’s in love with getting stoned, woah
He’s in love with Janie Jones, woah
He don’t like his boring job no…

An’ he know what he’d got to do
He know he’s gonna have fun with you
Lucky lady!
But when the evening comes when his job is done
He’ll be over in his car for you

He’s in love with rock ‘n’ roll, woah
He’s in love with getting stoned, woah
He’s in love with Janie Jones, woah
But he don’t like his boring job no…

In the in-tray lots of work
But boss at the firm always thinks he shirks
Be he’s just like everyone he’s got a Ford Cortina
That just won’t run without fuel
Fill her up Jacko!

He’s in love with rock ‘n’ roll, woah
He’s in love with getting stoned, woah
He’s in love with Jaine Jones, woah
But he don’t like his boring job no…

An’ the invoice if don’t quite fit
There’s no payola in his alphabetical file
‘Cept for the government man
This time he’s really gonna show the boss
Gonna really let him let him know exactly how he feels
It’s pretty bad!

He’s in love with rock ‘n’ roll, woah
He’s in love with getting stoned, woah
He’s in love with Janie Jones, woah
But he don’t like his boring job no…
Let them know
Let them know

Janie Jones said, “I like it!”

And so we rolled BTS.

The Week in Porno.

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I get asked a lot to post who star in the newest updates are for all the sites I shoot. I haven’t much, cause it’ll make this more of a spam site than a real blog…but lately I’ve got nothing to say, so I guess spammy is better than nothing, right?

Carla Cox is this week’s update at the world famous Blacks on Blondes. She’s about as hot as they come.

Newbie Faith Star took a trip to the Gloryhole.

I don’t even have any real good dirt to dish on either girl: Carla’s huge in Europe, and she’s doing a trip around the US Porno Circuit. She’s great to work with on set, and she loves what she does, and she puts on a great scene.

Faith is brand new. I think I shot her 4th or 5th scene. I do have a funny story about Faith. Well, I dunno if it’s “funny” like hee-haw funny, or more of just a tale from Porno Land: I shot Faith for both Gloryhole and Blacks on Blondes. Her BOB scene included some A. “A” is porno for anal. Faith wasn’t sure if she wanted to do A, but she was new, and wanted lots of work, so she took the BOB booking — and the A. After shooting her Faith Star interracial anal scene, she declared it off her dance card — at least for the time being. As she walked off set she told me, “No more A for me!”.

“Why?” I asked.

She just looked at me like I was a dope for even asking.

Dogfart writes on the Carla Cox Blacks on Blondes scene: Superhot Euro-babe Carla Cox is visiting LA from the Czech Republic. Unfortunately Carla is experiencing an extreme rarity in LA, rain, and lots of it! To get over her misery, she decides to sample some of the local dick offerings, especially some of the dark meat that is so rare in her own country! Carla isn’t shy about giving it all up for a good time, so the two lucky dudes that get to shake and bake with her get all her hot options…her pretty mouth, her sweet pussy, and even her luscious ass, individually, and in a blistering DP! Carla manages to turn an unfortunate vacation into ecstasy as she gets hammered everywhere by these 2 huge dicks before letting them take target practice with their jizz cannons and her open mouth!

I don’t think I coulda said it any better.

Big Black Dicks interracial sex videos

Katja Kassin Has Left The Building.

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From Adult DVD Talk:

Hello everybody,

I wanted to take the time to thank everybody in the porn industry and also my fans for the support over the last (almost) 7 years. I decided 2 weeks ago to retire from the adult industry and from sex/adult work in general. The reason is that I have done all that there is to do in the porn/adult/stripper/escort universe.

This year I have finally bought my own house in the SF Valley, a fixer upper foreclosure that I renovated. I remember in March 2003 when I first came to the US with 200 bucks in my pocket (in the year 2010 I can apply for citizenship) – I have come a very far way since then and now I just want to make sure that in another 7 years I can look back and still say that, “wow, have I come a long way in the past 7 years”.

I am very grateful for everything that I have gained by being in this industry. It has taught me a lot about myself, made me a lot of money, got me a lot of free time, made it possible for me to achieve what I wanted to do in almost a blink of an eye compared to how long it takes regular people to to the same. I have met amazing friends and had many good times. But also of course you gain a little, you loose a little so there is a price that I paid for that. I will always have that past. I will always have to deal with judgments until I die. I will have to explain myself to new people I meet and their families. Now is the time in my life where the gain-loose priorities change. I have put the gains to good use in my life and now I am looking at the other side of the calculation and I am realizing I have grown up and moved into a different direction.

When you are 23 you don’t give a fuck about much. You are hating on your parents anyway, you think you don’t need anyone and people talking shit about you makes you feel more important. Now that I am 30 years old it does matter to me what people think of me because I owe it to myself to create different, new things that I can be judged by. Next time my mom goes to get her hair done I don’t want her to have to lie anymore. I want her to say with a proud tone in her voice: “my daughter teaches German classes in L.A.” or whatever it is I am doing.

I don’t want to feel uncomfortable in relationships anymore because of what I do. It is hard for any man to date a porn star, even maybe after you retire. But it is simply impossible to have a relationship while you are making a living fucking other people. It’s been a great ride and a part of my life that I will always look back to with no regrets and lots of funny, weird and crazy stories. It was something that was fun and fit into my life at a younger age but now I want different things for myself.

It was part of my journey and made me who I am today but when I look forward I do not see myself sucking and fucking to pay my mortgage. I see myself working a job that maybe doesn’t pay insane amounts of money but that fulfills me and takes care of my bills that need to be paid. I see myself enjoying a routine, showing up at the same office or place of employment every day at the same time. I see myself building new, stable relationships. I see myself taking on new responsibilities, committing to one person, getting married, starting a family together, making cup cakes and carving pumpkins for Thanksgiving with my kids.

I know I don’t owe anyone any kind of explanation at all but it was important to me to make this statement to show you my reasons.

I have been known in the industry for being professional, reliable, on time and organized and these things haven’t changed so since I am looking for a new challenge and a new job if anyone has any offers or suggestions for me I can be reached at – I am very good working at an office desk but also organizing production and I am a good camera girl too.

Thanks again to everybody and especially to Mark Spiegler. Mark, I know you don’t realized it, maybe because I have never told you so, but I owe a lot to you. You were a great mentor and teacher to me and I am still thinking about what you would say in some situations in my life when I need advice. Thanks for your guidance! I will forever be grateful for having had you in my life at some point.

Thanks to all my co stars. There won’t be any juicy remarks now because I have always looked at working with you all as this: work and I think this is why many of you liked shooting with me.

I’ve never been a big attention whore and loved reading people’s comments on how great I am but if you have something good to say about me, if you have enjoyed my work over the last 7 years, please let me know. This is the time and place to do it! I have been looking forward to this very day when I would be writing this statement and now I am very happy but also crying. It’s always hard to leave something you know you’re good at.



What makes a girl do porn?

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From time to time I have guests blog whatever it is they feel like blogging. I will not tell them what to blog; I won’t edit it; I won’t influence the Guest Blogger in any way.

It was two years ago this month Mr. Wang was found dead in a motel room in Northern California. As I was poking through my old posts, figuring out what to re-post, I stumbled across this. My initial reaction was to leave well enough alone…but the more I thought about it, the more I thought to go with it.

This blog’s original date was February 21, 2006.

Billy writes: I spoke to Chico Wang tonight. Chico is one of the directors at Anabolic/Diabolic, and he’s responsible for titles like “No Swallowing Allowed” and “Down the Hatch.” He also invented The Minion. We spoke about a bunch of things – mostly porn related – then he showed me a post he wrote for an adult chat board. It was actually a re-post…Chico had written/posted it originally, and then someone re-posted it, and called it the “best post about porn ever”. So I asked Chico if I could re-post it one more time here, cause after I read it, I think it does really sum up THE most frequently asked question I get. Thanks Chico.

(And if you’re wondering, the girl in the pic here is Jaime Elle…dick sucker #57.

Chico Wang writes:

Here’s what a whore is and its relation to the adult business.

A whore is any girl who fucks for money.

I would say 90% of the girls in the industry hate what they do and fuck only for money.

I would also say that 99% of the girls in the industry hate getting assfucked but do it only for the money.

I would also say that 99% of the girls in the industry have serious issues such as but not limited to previous bouts with rape, incest, molestation, drug abuse, pimp boyfriends, etc.

Most have an IQ of room temperature. Most do not have automobiles. Most do not have bank accounts. Most do not and cannot acquire a credit card. Most squander all their porn earnings almost immediately. Most will end up penniless and return to the business because their job skills relegate them to a lifelong search for a drug dealing sugardaddy or public assistance. Most have complete lack of self-esteem. These are societal problems and cannot be blamed on an adult industry which neither cares or should care.

The fact that I could call a new porn girl a ‘fucking whore’ and, when I explain myself, they shower me with hugs as I tell them that they should suck as much dick as possible to get ahead tells you alot. Yes, I coach these girls too on how to be the best whore they can be. It’s more of a longevity and monetary issue as opposed to a derogatory one.

Here’s an interesting story. I usually have whores running rampant around my abode. When a friend asks me how he can get blown by these whores, I tell them to go up next to them and pull out their peckers. It’s the easiest way. Why? These girls are conditioned to suck dick. When there’s a dick in front of them, they look like a deer caught in the headlights and don’t know what to do. It’s instinct for them to suck it until it coats the back of their throats with nut butter.

Now tell me this. Do you think the girls in the industry love what they do? Nearly every scene ends in a facial. Can you really fathom how truly degrading this act really is? Can you really fathom how truly degrading it is to suck off 5 complete strangers and gulp down their ball snot and have to pretend they loved every minute of it? Can you really fathom how truly degrading it is to suck on a dick that’s been pulled out of your own asshole which smells like complete shit? They do it for the money and that’s what makes them whores.


I think alot of you forget after watching so many DVDs exactly what the reality is. You fall into a trap of fantasy land thinking these girls love what they do. If there was no paycheck involved, the female talent pool would drop to nothing. They don’t do it for the sheer love of it. They get drilled in the asshole, they take a mugfull of cum, they fuck complete strangers, because of one reason only.


Get out of fantasyland and really think about it.

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Cherry Poppens

Cherry Poppens hand job movies
When I was in junior high, I had a Social Studies teacher who was a total hippy. He’d play records on one of those small turntables you’d get from the A/V department at the school’s library, while we were working on whatever it was we were working on that day. One of his records was “The Worst of Jefferson Airplane”, and I’d always wonder why anyone would name anything “The Worst” of…until now.

I don’t think I mentioned this, but my date the other night for the Dylan show was Cherry. I know I mentioned the Dylan show, but not Cherry…who, by the way, is kicking ass outside the adult biz. She’s working hard and making her life and things for her are great. I used to wonder what happened to “these girls” once they left the biz. Well, they lead lives. So there ya go.

If you’ve ever written anything, you know a lot of times reading old writing is a lot like looking at old pictures of yourself. The difference is, you can’t change the way you look in those pics; however, you can edit your old writing. This time I’m choosing not to.

Which is to say I’ll stand by this.

This blog’s original air date: September 17, 2005

Lately I’ve been crushing on Cherry Poppens.

And not just a crush like oh there’s Cherry Poppens on a website doing this or that and boy I’d sure like to meet her crush


I’m single and I shoot porn and I’m feeling like I wanna have a girlfriend who’s in the biz and Cherry’s a porn star so that helps and we’re friendly and that helps and maybe she might like me so I should ask her out kind of crush.


Cherry’s super cool. I’ve worked with her a ton of times. In fact, I’ve hired her for everything I can, and given her multiple scenes on some of the sites I shoot: first for Spunkmouth, then JOMG; a few months went by and I hired her for a Spring Thomas scene, then a Gloryhole, and I hired her for Blacks on Blondes more than once or twice.

From a marketing angle, Cherry’s awesome: she’s a true redhead (rare), has great natural tits, she’s super cute, puts on a great scene, and does just about anything you can ask for…in other words, she sells.

On a personal note, she’s solid: drug and drama free, great personality, true redhead (really rare), is super cute, has great natural tits, and can carry an intelligent conversation on anything from punk rock (which I love) to politics (which I love to hate).

Which brings me back to why I even started writing this: I’ve been crushing on Cherry Poppens. I took this picture at the Hotel Roosevelt in Hollywood a long time ago. We were taking a break from work.

But she’s got a dude. And he’s probably this young, cool stud with cheek bones and washboard abs and tattoos and smokes unfiltered cigarettes while he hangs out on Venice Beach all day, skateboarding or surfing and not giving a shit about anything.

Which means I don’t have a chance.

Bob Dylan Hollywood Palladium show October 13 2009

Spunkmouth Kaya

When I was in junior high, I had a Social Studies teacher who was a total hippy. He’d play records while we were working on whatever it was we were working on that day. One of his records was “The Worst of Jefferson Airplane”, and I’d always wonder why anyone would name anything “The Worst” of…until now.

Lately people have been asking about being male talent in this industry. I thought I’d reflect upon my experience.

This blog’s original air date: September 19th, 2005

A lot of people ask me “whatever happened to (fill in the name of the porn girl here)?” so I think I’m gonna start a new category devoted solely to this.

Today I look back – fondly, I might add – at Kaya. I was lucky enough to shoot this Asian hottie two times, both in the same abadonded warehouse in a funky part of town. The first scene was a boy/girl scene with this cat named Sean; the second time Big Dick Nikle jumped into the action with Sean.

The first time I met her was at the warehouse – just minutes before we started shooing. In those days I always met the girls before I shot them, just to make sure I really wanted to work with them. For some reason Kaya couldn’t meet me, and Dick Nikle was going nuts over her, so I said sure, let’s do it.

When she walked in that warehouse, my jaw just about dropped.

She’s only 5 feet tall, which makes her D tits look even bigger than they already are. Her body was flawless, and her skin looked really smooth, and you could tell it was before you even touched it. I knew when I saw her this was the first true hottie I would shoot in my porno career. Not only was she hot, but she was really cool, too. And unlike most amateurs, she had this very keen sense of business. She knew the LA rates for scenes, cause I said, while we were shaking hands, “I want to shoot you as many times as I can” and she giggled and said “I’ll do two guys next, but I need $1000!”

I can’t believe these shoots went down almost 3 years ago. I can’t believe my stills were so awful. When I look at that picture I posted, I just shake my head. Oh well…there’s a learning curve for everything.

And I can’t believe Kaya was cool letting a few of my pals stand around and watch her get fucked while my camera was rolling. I’ll call it “The Peanut Gallery”.

And finally, I can’t believe she just vanished, but she did. I never saw her after that last scene. Word came to me from Dick Nikel that “her family discovered she was doing porn” and part of me believes that…and part doesn’t. Maybe she realized fucking on film wasn’t for her.

Not too long ago my pal Ryan, who works at one of my favorite record stores, had some exciting news. He went out to eat the previous night, and guess who waited on him? Yea…it was Kaya. I asked Ryan, “Did you tell her you’re a fan of her work on my site?

He didn’t. And that makes him a smart man.

Come Together: Colleen Del Rio is Serena Taylor is Heather Summers.

Ashley Jane
I dunno what I like more: my brand new Beatles box (mono-riffic!) or Serena Taylor. I’ve blogged them both before, so why not again?

My very favorite Beatle song is “Across The Universe”, but it’s not the one in the mono box, cause there’s no “Across The Universe” contained therein; forget about the version on the original Let It Be, too; you want to listen to “Across The Universe” off Let It Be (Naked). In fact I could go on and on about Let It Be (Naked), cause it’s my favorite Beatles album, and sure, Revolver and Rubber Soul and The White Album are awesome and probably “better”, but damn: “Two of Us” and “Dig a Pony” can bring me out of a blue funk anytime.

My very favorite Serena Taylor scene shows up on the world famous She was still Colleen del Rio, and not Serena Taylor, and certainly not Heather Summers. This is a more lo-fi Serena Taylor, as opposed to the later hi-fi version, and certainly not the polished, audiophile Heather Summers.

“Come Together” coincides with one of my very earliest childhood memories, thus making it my second favorite Beatle’s tune. I was a kid, and I was sitting in the passenger side of a van. Whether or not it was a van isn’t really important. My Uncle was behind the wheel. It really was my Uncle driving, and he is important, because he was a big influence on what I listened to, and this particular memory musta taken place when I was 6 or maybe 7, and as I sat there in the van or car or whatever, and, as the 8-track of Abbey Road played, he defined “Toe Jam Football” for me. I just wish I could remember what he told me it meant.

Serena Taylor’s second handjob sceneis a real doozie. She works a huge load from Stunt Cock, and she’s more Serena Taylor than Colleen Del Rio…whatever that means. I mean I know what it means, but I’m not sure that clarifies anything up for you.

I dunno if you can relate to “In My Life”, but it really speaks to me, so I’ll chart it as my #3 all-time Bealtes fav: All these places have their moments / With lovers and friends I still can recall / Some are dead and some are living / In my life I’ve loved them all for Lennon meant Stu Sutcliffe. And for me? Hmmm. Well…I’ll just leave it at Spring Thomas. Oh. And Barbie Cummings. And Jayma Reed. And Adrianna Nicole. And Audrey Elson.

In addition to giving hand jobs, Serena Taylor is a dick sucker. But that’s as far as she ever took it. I guess that’s where she drew the line in the sand. There’s a few girls who play this game. Maybe “game” isn’t the right word. They’ll jerk and suck on camera, but no pee-pee in the V-Jayjay. Makenzie Wilson and Ashley Jane immediately come to mind. It doesn’t make much sense to me, but hey…whatever is best for you is best for you. Serena’s scene at The Dick Suckers rocks.

You’re gonna think I’m crazy, but I’m gonna stick “She’s Leaving Home” here, not really cause I think it’s the 4th best Beatles song I’ve ever heard, but because I can write about it. I mean in the sense that it brings back a distinct memory for me, this being the summer of ’77: I spent it at Grandma’s house, and she still had some of my Uncle’s 8 tracks there, and the one I played over and over was Sgt. Pepper’s while I built model cars in her basement. It’s weird, cause I never built a model after that summer. It was just something to do that particular time in my life, I guess. Granny drove me up to the hobby store, and I picked a few out, and I remember the one I worked on the hardest was a souped-up pick up truck that had beer barrels in the bed, and as I worked on it I really listened to Sgt. Pepper’s, and I could identify most with the girl in the song, mainly cause it was at the age I was starting to question my parents and their rules. Not that I’d ever run away…but still, it’s fun for a 14 year old to think about after getting in some trouble.

In addition to her trip to the Gloryhole, Serena Taylor having her glasses splattered in jizz is a real hootenanny. Isn’t it funny that Serena would never do a boy/girl sex scene, but she’s suck off an anonymous black cock through a hole in the wall? Or suck off two creeps until they rendered her reading glasses unusable?

Speaking of Sgt. Pepper’s, I gotta go with “A Day In The Life” to wind this down, and I’m not gonna say much, other than it really is in my top 5 Beatles’ songs, and, there’s nothing more I like to do that turn you on. After all, it’s my job.

I Got Paid To Fuck Gia Paloma

Gia Paloma
When I was in junior high, I had a Social Studies teacher who was a total hippy. He’d play records while we were working on whatever it was we were working on that day. One of his records was “The Worst of Jefferson Airplane”, and I’d always wonder why anyone would name anything “The Worst” of…until now.

Lately people have been asking about being male talent in this industry. I thought I’d reflect upon my experience.

This blog’s original air date: January 27th, 2007

The first guy to rent my new studio runs a site called We Be Lez. It’s not too hard to figure out what kind of dirty movies he makes from the name of the site.

It’s exciting, anytime you start a business, to get your first sale. I don’t even think my studio is ready to take on rentals, but here I am, renting it, which means (I hope) that when it is ready to show to potential renters, it’ll be easy.

So when my renter — who I’ll refer to herein as We Be Lez — got to my studio, we exchanged niceties, and while I gave him The Tour, he told me who he had booked for the following day: Gia Paloma, Tyla Winn, and Isis Love. Not a bad line-up, if you ask me.

Like any good host, at the end of The Tour, I asked if he had any questions.

“Yea Billy, I got one for you. Would you work the camera for me tomorrow while I work a dildo on Gia Paloma?”

To be honest, I was kinda hoping for the day off. I wanted to get out and hunt down decent used porno sofas for my empty sets, and I just wanted to get out of the studio for the day…but it’s Gia Paloma, and who wouldn’t want to watch her get banged with a dildo? Plus, Gia and I were kinda friendly — Adriana Nicole introduced us one night, and we all went out for Sushi. It would be nice to see her again. So I agreed.

“Um, I got one more question for ya, Billy.”

He hesitated before the “um” and “I one more question for ya”, and that made me nervous.

I looked at him. “Yea,” I said.

“Think you would fuck Gia for me tomorrow? On camera?”

I shot back immediately, “Oh no. I’m not male talent.”

“I know. I know. That’s OK.”

Then, he didn’t say anything. He just looked at me.

Silence. Then, more silence. I looked down at the ground. My head started working…at about 40 miles an hour. “You don’t really want me to fuck Gia.”

“Yes, I do.”

More silence.

My head picked up to 55 miles an hour, mainly cause I haven’t been laid since October. And ever since I met Gia, I thought she was really hot. In fact I saw her once, a week or so after our Sushi dinner, and Gia was walking her dog, cause she lives across the street from my studio, and she looked great. “But you really don’t want me. Really bro. I mean dude, I’ve got an Average Joe Dick — certainly not Joe Porno Dick. Besides, you run a lesbo site. Who wants to watch a boy-girl scene when they join a lesbo site?”

“My members like boy-girl sex from time to time. And I don’t care about your dick size. I think there’s lots of guys out there who don’t mind seeing an average guy like yourself fuck a beautiful girl. Plus, I’ll pay you three hundred dollars.”

Extended silence.

And as the silence just hung there, thick in the air, I could feel myself caving in. And thinking I cannot believe this conversation is really going down. I’m being offered a job to fuck a girl — and not just any girl — and I’m being offered 300 bucks to bang Gia Paloma. I’m a middle-aged guy who’s 25 pounds overweight with a 6 inch wiener and someone is offering me money to fuck a Porn Star. What kind of world do we live in?

I think my head was up to, like, 70 miles an hour. “I dunno man,” I said.

“She wants to fuck you,” We Be Lez said.

Well now this was just plain silly. My head crashed. And this time my reaction was immediate: “Gia Paloma does NOT want to fuck me!”

“She does! Honest man!! We had this conversation when I was booking her!”

I could feel my face grow flush and get warm. We went back and forth, and I kept insisting that Gia didn’t want to fuck me, and We Be Lez kept saying Gia did, so I told We Be Lez I’d think about it.

We Be Lez asked, “What are my chances I’ll get the scene?”

“Um, I’m maybe 80% sure. I’ll let you know tomorrow.”

And the next day he came right back at me. “So, have you made up your mind yet? Do you want to fuck Gia?”

I had, and I would.

I wanted to for all sorts of reasons, none of which had anything to do with bragging to you fuckers about it, or bragging to my friends about it; I did want to fuck Gia on a purely sexual level, but I knew doing it with her in front of a camera was not really all that sexual and mostly just work. Hard work. Laugh all you want, but until you step in front of those lights, sans clothes, just to put on a show for pervy dudes like yourself, with a really hot girl…well, until that happens to you, then you’ll never know what I mean.

But damn, it was a really crazy to think that I was getting hired as a porno dude, and it was a really weird thing to think that I was getting hired as a porno dude, and, when it comes down to it, that was really the main impetus for my decision.

Well, that and I get to fuck Gia Paloma.

“Um, can I ask you one other thing, Billy?”

I braced myself. And winced.

“Think you can give her an anal creampie?”

I laughed. Out loud. Really hard. “Dude. I am not male talent. Let’s just see if I can make it through this.”

The truth: I was intimidated by Gia Paloma. Big time. And I told her so when she walked in. In fact, we huddled up in my make-up room and I went over everything — from my feelings about the scene, and how it was presented to me, to the actual sex act itself, and how I should do it, and if she could help me, and she was really, really sweet about the whole thing.

And guess what? She did wanna fuck me. That I will brag about. So there.

Well, at least she told me that before the scene. Which is a really smart thing to tell male talent before you’re about to work with him, cause the last thing you want is a limp dick on set. Especially one that admits to being intimidated.

Before the scene rolled, we were filling out paperwork, and I was behind Gia, and getting kinda pervy, and the next thing you know the paperwork’s on the floor, and me and Gia are, too, and We Be Lez is rolling camera. Things went great. In our business, that’s called “BTS” — behind the scenes.

After that, Gia did her thing, and We Be Lez did his thing with the dildo, and I did my thing with the camera, and Gia was simply amazing. I don’t even like solo toy videos, but Gia fucking got me going…which was a good thing, cause before I knew it, it was my turn.

I did OK. I was strong out of the starting blocks, but I kinda stumbled about 1/2 through the race. But Gia would look me in the eye and say really naughty things. Super Naughty. Things that would get you arrested in, say, 80% of the world.

She pulled my nipples…really hard.

She breathed heavy…right into my ear.

She stuck her tongue deep in my mouth.

Then she whispered more filthy things that only I could hear. And even though this was a show, she made me believe every fucking word she said.

I spit in her mouth.

She spit back into mine.

I loved every second of it.

Then, she got on her hands and knees.

As I was about to fuck her doggy style, she pissed all over my dick.

And when she was done pissing, she looked over her shoulder and right at me and said, “Now fuck my ass.”

I looked over at We Be Lez, and his eyes were as big as plates. I think this meant he liked The Show. I need to mention, at this point in the story, that I’m not a big ass man. I mean I like asses, but I don’t really ever feel the need to fuck them. And when I stuck it into Gia’s bottom, I heard her say something like “that piss makes my ass burn” and that totally threw me off.

I don’t want to make Gia’s ass burn.

Which is to say I totally lost my wood.

Which is to say no anal cream pie.

It took a little bit after that, but I was good for The Money Shot, and then I scooped it up and fed it to Gia, cause she asked me to, and then she smiled and thanked me, and that was that.

The End.

Of the scene, and my career as male talent. With one scene under my belt, I’m now officially retired. Cause as great as it was to get paid to have sex with Gia Paloma, I know it’s not the sort of thing for me.

Afterward, we laughed about it, and we went and had Baked Ziti and Italian sausage in Larchmount, and then we went to Pinkberry for yogurt, and then we went to Nina Hartley’s Polyamorous Workshop, cause Gia and Nina are pals, and I got to meet Nina, and guess what? She’s one of the most intelligent women I’ve heard speak, and she’s a nice person, and I bought a copy of her new book, and she signed it for me, and you should but a copy, too.

We talked about working together, too! Imagine that: Nina Hartley at Blacks On Blondes! (Since then, I’ve been lucky to bring Nina to a glory hole, as well as Blacks on Cougars.)

Nina told me, “Oh, I fucked FM Bradley in 1984,” she said and smiled, “and it pissed a lot of people off.”

If the scene goes down, it will certainly turn into another blog…and somehow, in 2007, I don’t think anyone will be pissed about it at all.

We’ve come a long way, right?

Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex